Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the stacks
Not a patron was stirring, not even the chaps.
The holds were all pulled and sorted with care
In hopes that their readers soon would be there.
The DVDs were nestled all snug in the racks,
Despite Warner Brothers giving the sack.
And the Director in her holiday sweater, and I in my cap,
all locked up and ready to find out what was on tap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
We sprang from the room to see what was the matter.
Away to the window we flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
When what to our wondering eyes should appear
But reps from Overdrive, Amazon, and HarperCollins…with beer!
And a small device so sleek and so little,
We knew in a moment it must be a Kindle.
More rapid than eagles and rabbits they came,
Whistling, and shouting, and calling by name:
“We’ve got Patterson, and Evanovich, and Koontz, and Grisham!
And we brought beer and Kindles and food for your kitchen!
We want to play nice, we want to make friends,
Please let us in so that we can make amends!”
And then in a twinkling we heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of boots and each hoof.
As we drew in our heads and were turning around,
Through the dropped ceiling came St. Nicholas with a bound.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And we laughed when we saw him, in spite of ourselfs!
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave us to know we had nothing to dread.
He spoke many words, going straight to his work,
and yelling out the window, “Hey, you guys are jerks!”
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, out the window he dove!
He sprang to the reps, to his team gave a whistle
And together they turned them away with a bristle.
But we heard him exclaim before he drove out of sight
“Don’t mess with librarians, and DRM is too tight!”